Contingent modes of self-esteem.
The psychologist and meditation teacher Matthew Brensilver can convey many-layered ideas in very few words. He was talking to a group of mindfulness teachers about how we need to monitor the ego’s need to reinforce itself by seeking the approval of others. And how the tendency to reify the ego can be further reinforced when we receive both positive and negative feedback if we’re not paying attention. He points out:
“We need to drain the affective charge of contingent modes of self-esteem.”
Wow. Let that soak in for a bit. I find that my life is full of contingent modes of self-esteem. And draining their affective charge is a constant work in progress!